REFER TO GREY: Contemplations by Robert Greigos © 2007-2025

When I first looked at the above image a few weeks ago, I thought I saw two young men sharing a moment of joyous camaraderie. You know, how kids will often embrace each other in celebration upon winning a big game or pulling off a great stunt that one-ups someone on their “shit list”. But later, upon looking again more closely, I began to wonder if that was actually a correct reading.

I ask you now, what do you see?

The image was, of course, made decades ago in the very late 1960’s on the streets of Chicago. It was also early in my personal history doing what has since become known as “street photography”. At that time, I had been employed off and on as both a professional photojournalist and as public relations photographer. Both gigs involved making images of people being people, photographs that hopefully told a story that would interest either my editor or my client. But, when I made the above image, I wasn’t trying to please either of them. I made the image for me. I made it because I believed at the time I was capturing a piece of history, a moment true to my life experience and also true to the actual life experience of those two boys.

At the time, I did nothing with the image except to develop and proof it. I gave it little to no thought. But now, looking back, I’m curious. What did I think I was seeing at the time? And, what did I actually see and record at the time?

Ambiguity is not normally comfortable for any of us to perceive, though most of us are practiced at projecting ambiguity. Projecting ambiguity keeps us closer to blameless. Without clear evidence of responsibility, there is doubt as to who is to blame. Perceiving ambiguity, on the other hand, brings on feelings of discomfort and anxiety. From the available evidence we have trouble understanding the course of things, what could happen next. There are too many possibilities implied. And we quickly feel overwhelmed at the task of attempting to prepare for any or all of those possibilities.

Back to that picture. I keep thinking about the guy on the right being a little bit taller with his arm higher and possibly tighter around the neck of the other kid. Is that actual camaraderie? Or is that physical domination and maybe even coercion? In other words, is that bullying? Bullying does happen. It happened then and it happens now. Bullying is a latent immature impulse of many young human males and some young human females, a grab for and trial exercise of adult-like power, especially power over others.

Bullying is not always condoned by human societies. Most establish rearing and socialization practices that minimize its development. Why? Because bullying undermines cohesive cooperation that enhances survival and even prosperity for the larger group. War has been the all too often consequence of societal failure to squelch bullying, wherein bullying has developed into an inspired attempt by one or a group of humans to subjugate and exploit other humans that they perceive as having lesser “strength” and/or value as humans. It’s the old “might make right” ethic, where power over others becomes its own justification and provides its own raison d’être.

I agree that we have before us an image that is not completely clear, not completely free of disturbing ambiguity. But it does offer us a chance to potentially think about and tune our senses to the deleterious budding of bullying amongst our young people. If those who had responsibility for rearing all the practicing and would be bullies operating in the world today, if they had taken a different wiser path, we likely would not be dealing with all the turmoil, human torment, and environmental destruction we see in the news, online, and around us today.

Be a wiser mentor, parent, teacher, citizen, and sibling. Put a stop to the development of more and more mindless ignorant anti-social self-serving would be bullies. We have quite enough of them as it is, and could do nicely with a whole lot fewer.